For Every Action...
Something I learned quite recently is that
not everything requires a reaction.
This year, I have worked under two different managers at my job. The first one I had was meh. She was a bit much and she had that “my way or the highway” attitude. She and I clashed…a lot. We got along fine some days but there were some when I just absolutely could not stand her. I had been working there for about a year and a half when she started so I was used to a particular routine and doing this a certain way and she came in she flipped a lot of things around. She was like a bull in a china shop.
As someone who needs organization and likes routine, this was a very rough adjustment for me. Actually, I basically refused to adjust. I hated everything she did, everything she suggested, and how she managed the store. I constantly found myself pushing back against her suggestions or ideas or advice. I pretty much vetoed everything and continued to do things the way I always had. (I am known to be extremely stubborn.) Any time she would make a change to the store, even if it didn’t affect me directly, I would get agitated. If it did affect me then I would lose my shit. I could feel my blood boiling and my adrenaline would spike.
This one time she had declared that we were going to change how we do BOSS. (Which is a program we use to process online orders through our store). BOSS was always done in the mornings before we opened and as someone who was usually the opener, I got very good at doing it and I did it quickly and efficiently. When she wanted to change that, I felt it was a direct attack on my person. So, instead of just accepting and adapting to the change, I fought her on it. I ignored her and refused to do it her way. Then, because I was upset I would give her attitude or be rude to her. I would say one word to her or not say anything at all, I would be snappy and sassy and honestly, I was just an ugly person. It’s like I would black out and my evil alter ego would come out.
She didn’t last long. Although, for reasons completely unrelated to my bitchy attitude.
A while after she had left I had come to the realization that there was no need for me to act that way towards her. I recognized that not everything required such a harsh reaction or a reaction at all. I could have just accepted what she was doing and moved but I didn’t. I spent so much time and energy hating her, being upset with her, and being a stubborn bitch and it didn’t do anything for me. It was literally pointless. I just ended up ruining my whole day because I was upset about something that was so miniscule in the grand scheme of things.
I do feel badly about how I acted towards her, now. Too little too late, I know.
So, with that realization in mind, I decided I would be more open and welcoming to our new manager and her ideas for how she wanted to run our store, etc…
Thus far, it’s been okay. I haven’t had any breakdowns or outbursts of anger or what have you. I’ve been taking it one day at a time. Each time I clock in, I remind myself to think first, speak / act later. If something does happen, I wait till I get home to have an outburst while I’m talking to my parents about it.
Remember guys, not everything needs a reaction. Take your time to think about how you want to react before you do. Ask yourself if your reaction is appropriate for the situation.
With Love & Support,
Molly
This year, I have worked under two different managers at my job. The first one I had was meh. She was a bit much and she had that “my way or the highway” attitude. She and I clashed…a lot. We got along fine some days but there were some when I just absolutely could not stand her. I had been working there for about a year and a half when she started so I was used to a particular routine and doing this a certain way and she came in she flipped a lot of things around. She was like a bull in a china shop.
As someone who needs organization and likes routine, this was a very rough adjustment for me. Actually, I basically refused to adjust. I hated everything she did, everything she suggested, and how she managed the store. I constantly found myself pushing back against her suggestions or ideas or advice. I pretty much vetoed everything and continued to do things the way I always had. (I am known to be extremely stubborn.) Any time she would make a change to the store, even if it didn’t affect me directly, I would get agitated. If it did affect me then I would lose my shit. I could feel my blood boiling and my adrenaline would spike.
This one time she had declared that we were going to change how we do BOSS. (Which is a program we use to process online orders through our store). BOSS was always done in the mornings before we opened and as someone who was usually the opener, I got very good at doing it and I did it quickly and efficiently. When she wanted to change that, I felt it was a direct attack on my person. So, instead of just accepting and adapting to the change, I fought her on it. I ignored her and refused to do it her way. Then, because I was upset I would give her attitude or be rude to her. I would say one word to her or not say anything at all, I would be snappy and sassy and honestly, I was just an ugly person. It’s like I would black out and my evil alter ego would come out.
She didn’t last long. Although, for reasons completely unrelated to my bitchy attitude.
A while after she had left I had come to the realization that there was no need for me to act that way towards her. I recognized that not everything required such a harsh reaction or a reaction at all. I could have just accepted what she was doing and moved but I didn’t. I spent so much time and energy hating her, being upset with her, and being a stubborn bitch and it didn’t do anything for me. It was literally pointless. I just ended up ruining my whole day because I was upset about something that was so miniscule in the grand scheme of things.
I do feel badly about how I acted towards her, now. Too little too late, I know.
So, with that realization in mind, I decided I would be more open and welcoming to our new manager and her ideas for how she wanted to run our store, etc…
Thus far, it’s been okay. I haven’t had any breakdowns or outbursts of anger or what have you. I’ve been taking it one day at a time. Each time I clock in, I remind myself to think first, speak / act later. If something does happen, I wait till I get home to have an outburst while I’m talking to my parents about it.
Remember guys, not everything needs a reaction. Take your time to think about how you want to react before you do. Ask yourself if your reaction is appropriate for the situation.
With Love & Support,
Molly
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