Follow Your Arrow

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It's hard thinking that you're behind everyone else your own age because of the anxiety. Always comparing yourself in your life to others at a different stage than you. Try not to compare yourself because it's like trying to compare apples to oranges. They are two different fruits. Just like you are two different people. 
I used to think that because I wasn't where my peers were in their life that I was flawed. I would see them having fun in college, starting their careers and here I was on the sidelines trying to get my first job. 
My mom would tell me over and over again that it's unfair of me to compare myself to them because I am going at my own pace and everyone has their own path to take in life.  
My therapist would say that I'm focusing on the automatic thoughts "shoulds must/oughts"
Thinking that I SHOULD be doing what my peers are doing. I SHOULD be going to college. I SHOULD be working. I SHOULD be moving out. Apparently, thinking that way only made things worse because I wasn't accepting where I was in my life. 
They were right though. When I finally did accept that I am on a different page of my life than the others, I could focus on taking those "baby steps" to getting my life together. I couldn't move forward like my peers because there were still things I had to learn, like managing my anxiety. 
Everyone has their own path to take and sometimes it takes others longer to find that path. It doesn't mean that you are a bad person or defective just that you require a little more time to get there. 
My brother was 22 when he finally decided what he wanted to do so, he enrolled in culinary school. My cousin as well. She was about 23 when she enrolled. Then she realized she didn't want to be a chef and went back to school at 24. 
You see, it doesn't matter what everyone else is doing with their life, all that matters is what you are doing with yours. You have to do what's right and what's best for you. And if it takes you some time to figure that out it's okay. You aren't the only one. 

With Love & Support, 
Anxiety Girl - xoxo

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